Mindset.

Period.

No, it’s not your “innate talent”. Not whether you come from an affluent family. Not weather you were born at a more developed country.

It’s YOU.

Yes, all of the uncontrollable factors HAVE effect on your INITIAL settings.

If you were born to open-minded parents you are more likely to be open-minded.

If you were born to a rich family you are more likely to get better education hence create more wealth.

If your culture encourages individuality instead of conforming, you’re more likely to work on your instead of other people’s dreams.

More likely.

It’s not absolute, just like everything else in life.

You can be born to the most close-minded parents yet still break free from that caged mindset and create freedom for yourself.

You can be born to a broke family yet become the richest person on earth (read about John Davison Rockefeller).

You can be raised in the most rigid, restrictive culture yet ignore the “norm” and create how life is supposed to look for you.

Yes, it’s not easy; who ever says it is?

But it’s simple and straight forward.

All you need to do is to change your mindset.

5 steps to shift your mind (hence life)

Rule #1

Stop listening to people who you don’t want to end up as.

Anyone’s opinions can only help you become them, cuz that what’s make them become them at the first place.

Read that again.

Start unlearning what other people taught you.

A is good, B is bad, you can’t C, you must D.

Fuxk all that.

YOU say so.

What do YOU think?

Oh, I can feel your confusion…

You think you can’t make good decisions, so in order to secure yourself from dangers, you chose to listen to other people’s opinions.

Just to be safe, right?

Well, it’s indeed the most guaranteed way…

To end up mediocre.

Look at the people who “taught” you these things.

Do you want to be like them??

The ones who are living an unfulfilling life?

Thinking that life is so unfair and constantly feeling jealous of other people?

Using judging and bringing other people down to make them feel better about their pathetic selves?

Going to bed with a bitter, hatred-filled heart?

Watching life pass them by and their dreams hence soul dies out day after day?

You won’t want to end up like that.

Or, you are already like that and you no longer want to continue living such crappy life.

What’s the point??

So let’s change.

Rule #2

Question everything.

They say A is good. Why?

Most of the time that opinion giver cannot give you any explanation and will bee shockede that you “dare” to question their rigid belief out of nowhere.

(Well, not actually nowhere; perhaps from their parents, which inherited from their parents, which inherited from their parents… I don’t know how many generations can you chase, probably to your earliest ancestors.

Afterall, it seems like you are the first person who ever questioned that! Or that stupid belief would have long been broken and will not have a chance to enter your ears.)

Ok, let’s say they give you an explanation, and even a real-life example (or examples) to support their stance.

But is that example interpreted in the right way?

Is that example being inclusive? Like it’s the “principles” of how the world works?

For example, your dearest aunt told you that if you can’t get into college, you are doomed.

And she went on quoting a ton of examples of how people around her failed miserably as they failed to enter college.

You starts to freak out and your mind narrows down to one single goal- get into college.

When you have a ton of other options and clearly most of the richest people on earth didn’t get rich because of their college degree (and most don’t even have one!).

This is fear in action- it narrows your mind.

You no longer care what you want out of this life.

You only want to survive- it’s human nature and how your brain works.

It prioritises survival above anything else.

That’s why humans love comfort so so much and would sacrifice anything (even our dreams and happiness) for it. (read: the mountain is you, by Brianna Wiest)

But if you step out of that fear and look- objectively- is what she’s saying true?

I mean, did every single person who failed to enter college fail?

And, did every single person who graduated college succeed, in a way you desire?

If no, and you know it, why did you still take her opinions?

Because that’s your habit.

You have a habit of constantly learning from every single person around you.

Well, it makes sense; this is how we learn to adapt to our family, our culture, our society, as a child.

A child learns how to walk, speak, and behave by looking at other people around them.

A child needs to adapt and get other people to accept them because they cannot survive otherwise.

So you can see, this habit did serve its purpose in helping you grow up safely.

But now we are grown.

We no longer depend on others as much as a child does.

We still depend on each other on survival (and to thrive), but we now can survive on our own for a while until we find the right people who encourage and support our dreams.

We now have a choice to leave people we don’t like.

To leave people who walk different paths as us.

They conform, we break free.

They live for others, we live for ourselves.

They think about what they need in order to survive, we think about what we want in order to thrive.

Life is for realising your dreams, after all.

Or what do you think it’s for?

Survive just to survive?

Repeat just to repeat?

Stay unhappy til the day you die?

No, no, and no.

Dreams. Your dreams.

The world is your oyster.

What do you want? How can you get it?

Are the only two questions you need to navigate through life, as the happiest person.

Rule #3

Find out what you want.

Ask yourself.

No one can tell you what you want, and no one want the exact same life as that you desire.

Look into the mirror. What do YOU want?

Think about what moves you.

The thing that everything you sees, pulls the strings of your heart?

Perhaps it’s being the greatest opera singer.

Perhaps it’s being a pilot.

Perhaps it’s being a medical doctor.

What do you really, really want, that you would die for it?

Rule #4

You are worthy of anything you desire.

No, don’t brush your desires aside and tell yourself “I don’t want it at all” because you think there is no chance.

Too many people do that, and their souls and dreams were buried way earlier than the day their bodies were.

Why would you do that to yourself?

Please don’t. You deserve everything you desire as long as you are willing to put in the effort.

If you are willing to climb up the climax of a mountain, you are worthy of appreciating the spectacular scenery, regardless of how other people (who stands at the foot of the mountain, unwilling to even lift a finger) judge you.

Rule #5

Hard work alone doesn’t work.

It doesn’t matter how much effort you put in if you are putting them in the wrong place.

It’s like selling jewelries in your own room without going online– it doesn’t matter how loud you shout or how perfect your craft is or how low you set the price. No one is going to know hence buy them!

So, we got to be smart.

We have to find out what moves the needle. This is non-negotiable.

Don’t start working until you know what should you work on, and how should you work.

But at the same time start working once you discover a possible direction (to avoid tutorial hell- using “researching” as an excuse to procrastinate!).

Put what you learned into action, no matter how little you think you know, how stupidly you will fail.

You have no time to care about these if your mind is dedicated to succeed.

You know failure is not a destination, it is part of the process.

Continue putting in the work, seeking feedback (whether it’s from data or expert’s opinions), and pivoting (adjusting your course of action).

Once you hit a bottle neck, re-enter the research process to identify missing gaps (between your current situation and your ideal situation).

If you do these with the right mindset- the “experiment” mindset, and are consistent- you WILL inevitably succeed.

Inevitably.

How can you possibly do every right thing right, yet not get the right result?

Your life changes, NOW

Sometimes you just need a messenger to awake the giant within you.

Your ideal self is already within you.

You just have to bring it out.

You already know what you want.

You now even know what you need to do.

The only step left is to put everything you know into action.

It is really that simple.

You can absolutely achieve it.

You may think it’s “impossible”, but once you achieve that- you will see how stupid you used to be thinking that it’s “impossible” for you.

Visualise yourself living the life of your dreams.

How do you feel? How do you look?

Where do you live? Where do you go? Who are with you?

Visualise all these things.

Really feel that you are living that life, being that person.

Make it a habit and it WILL transit into your reality, in no time.

Do it.

Do it.